Long before I met my husband I heard about a fascinating study that claimed to have discovered the single greatest determiner of a lasting marriage. Whether or not the researchers actually found THE single greatest determiner is debatable, but I still think they were pretty right on. I’ve written about this study here before, but after I found myself sharing …
Sex Talk and the Single Life
A lot of Christian leaders have been talking about sex lately. The publicity has generated a great deal of conversation–some good, some not so good–as Christians continue to learn about godly sexuality and its proper place in the Christian life. As important as it is to have these conversations and to seek greater understanding, these discussions can also present a …
Keeping Marital Intimacy Intimate
As many of you have probably heard, Mark Driscoll and his wfie, Grace, are coming out with a new book called Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together. I have not read the book so I will not comment on any of its contents here, but I have heard that it gets into explicit detail about sexual …
The Trophy Generation Gets Married
One of my favorite shows on television right now is 30 Rock. Lately I’ve been catching up on old episodes on Netflix, and I recently watched a clip that I thought was both hilarious and thought-provoking. In case you’ve never seen the show, it follows an SNL-like t.v. show created by head writer Liz Lemon, played by Tina Fey. Alec …
How My Marriage is Changing Me
When Ike and I first got married, our personalities landed on very different ends of the spectrum between justice and mercy. While I have always been a “truth speaker”–meaning I see things in black and white, tend to be dogmatic, and speak my mind before pausing to listen–Ike is a peacemaker. He is very intuitive, has a great grasp on …
Why I Go to Marriage Counseling
For Ike and me, this weekend is all about celebrating marriage. Today we’ll attend the wedding of some friends in Memphis, and on Monday we’ll celebrate two years of marriage back in Chicago. This year I’m in charge of planning our anniversary and it’s a surprise, so more details later! I love that our anniversary falls on the same weekend …
Growing Into True Love
When I was in seminary I had a professor who used to say, “People don’t get married for love, but for lust. Only later does marriage teach us what love is.” I don’t think we should push too hard on that idea–there are all sorts of exceptions to it–but I agree with the basic premise. The early stages of a …
Commandment #10
This is a little weird to admit, but for the majority of my adult life I gave almost no thought to a very particular section of the tenth commandment. Until recently, I read through the tenth commandment as if one part of it was not even there. It was that irrelevant to me. In case you need a refresher, the …
Looking Good For Your Man
Well it’s almost mid-May in Chicago which, I am learning, means that Spring is finally starting to peek out from under the frozen tundra. It’s not in full bloom, mind you, but there are some flowers here and there and I finally put away my down coat until next winter. In case you were wondering, I really miss North Carolina. …
The Language of Love
Soon after Ike and I got engaged my dad presented us with two books: His Needs Her Needs, by Willard F. Harley, and The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. I had already read parts of The Five Love Languages, so we decided to start with His Needs Her Needs (which we really enjoyed and I highly recommend!). Only last …