Because I Would Rather Do Anything Else Right Now Than Write This Paper…

Sharon Uncategorized 1 Comment

I thought I would procrastinate with the following post. I don’t have time to think deep thoughts because I’m funneling all of my intelligence into a 16 page paper, but I found some bumper stickers that I thought were kind of funny, so if you need to procrastinate as well, then enjoy! (And p.s.–these bumper stickers don’t necessarily reflect my religious views, but I think sometimes it’s healthy to laugh at ourselves…I hope you agree).

Get a Taste of religion. Lick a Hindu.

God’s true name is unpronounceable…because God is Welsh.

If God didn’t want us to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat?

God please grant me chastity, but not just yet. – St. Augustine

If you were made in God’s image, how did you get to be so ugly?

The Big Bang theory: And God said ‘Pulleth my Finger’

And now, the TOP TEN THINGS PEOPLE WON’T SAY WHEN THEY SEE A CHRISTIAN BUMPER STICKER OR FISH ON A CAR:

10. “Look! Let’s stop that car and ask those folks how we can become
Christians.”

9. “Don’t worry, Billy, those people are Christians. They must have a
good reason for driving 90 miles an hour.”

8. “What a joy to be sharing the highway with another car of
Spirit-filled brothers and sisters.”

7. “Isn’t it wonderful how God blessed that Christian couple with a
brand-new BMW?”

6. “Dad, how come people who drive like that don’t get thrown in jail?
Can we get a bumper sticker like that, too?”

5. “Stay clear of those folks, Martha. If they get raptured, that
car’s gonna be all over the road!”

4. “Oh, look! That Christian woman is getting a chance to share Jesus
with a police officer.”

3. “No, that’s not garbage coming out of their windows, Bert. It’s
probably gospel tracts for the road workers.”

2. “Oh boy, we’re in trouble now! We just rear-ended one of God’s
cars.”

1. “Quick, Alice, honk the horn or they won’t know that we love
Jesus!”

I put this up there because I used to have a fish on my car and yet I drove like a maniac. I think people might have noticed the inconsistency…

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